How the hell are you supposed to write about an instrumental? Guess we’re about to find out. I’m talking about the main combat soundtrack of the crazy ass game called Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy. This is the song that plays when the invaders come and attempt to kick your shit in. Considering how often it played throughout the game you’d think I’d be tired of it, but nope. I’ve grown quite fond of this energetic and enigmatic soundtrack. Enough to write a blog post about it evidently. So if you’ve got any interest in reading about an instrumental you can follow along.
(For the record this isn’t the only blog post I’ve been working on but it’s the shorter one that can come out quicker so here we go)
What’s this? another review from Spartan? That’s right folks, here’s part 2 of my Haunt the House series, this time we’re tackling Terror Town. This is a game that I’m not familiar with, as I wasn’t able to play it on Armor Games or any other free flash game website. But thankfully, the collection allows me to play it whenever I please. As always I’ll be going for the best possible rank with no deaths, but if you saw my previous review, you’ll know that it isn’t easy to do that.
I recently duked it out with a big ass flying roly poly. I won eventually but not without a collection of Ls. I am sure I will take a while to finish Silksong, and if I want to do a long ass blog about it I will do so long after it’s a hot topic. Perhaps that time has passed already. Oh well. So now you get a shorter than usual from me but not entirely short blog instead. I had a fight with a big bug and now I’m going to talk about it.
‘hoy folks, Spartan here with another review for the…
oh wait, this isn’t for the game trade, Mr. Cosmia doesn’t even know this game exists!
Yeah, I figured that I might as well use this platform that I’ve been given access to to shed light on games that I find somewhat interesting, but don’t think would be good enough to subject Mr. Cosmia to. Games that are either very short, very complicated or just don’t have enough content to justify a full dedicated review to. That being said, Haunt the House
This is a game released by the Super Flash Bros, a small indie developer who primarily dealt with making flash games (RIP flash, we hardly knew you) that I initially thought was lost when Flash was terminated, only to see it alive and well on Steam along with others of the series that I never got the chance to play. So while it’s still October, I figure I’ll review the whole series, starting with the game that started it all in 2010.
Every journey has a destination, and what one would encounter on the way is entirely up to chance. When I started this set of trades with Mr. Cosmia, I did so with noble (albeit) selfish reasons. Back then, I wasn’t as connected with people who shared my interests as I am now, and just wanted to share what I thought was a good game series. And on some level, I believe Mr. Cosmia thought the same. But then FromSoft games started getting into the mix, beginning with Bloodborne.
Full disclosure for those expecting a lighthearted review that will praise this game and the developers who made it a reality: you are going to be sorely disappointed for I have made it no secret of my animus towards these types of games. Dark Souls was the progenitor of the souls-like genre, games that put you in a world with little resources and expect you to conquer enemies that can shred your health bar in seconds if you’re not careful, and bosses with often very cheap tactics that can kill you even faster. They are the definition of “Get gud” games, where you are expected to win by learning patterns, adapting to situations and overcoming obstacles after several attempts. Occassionally, you are thrown a bone by the developers, be it new weapons, upgrades to your limited healing item or other things to “help” you. Often, the games employ alternate paths (a closed gate for example) near where you enter the enemy infested area. Pulling a switch on the other side of the gate will open it, and allow you to avoid the enemies you had to get through to get to it. But make no mistake, for you’re still feeble enough that the random dog can take you out if you’re not careful.
These games are a popular pastime for those who enjoy a hard challenge, but I am not one of those people. If I wanted Mr. Cosmia to try a lengthy game, 5/10 times a FromSoftware game was going to be given in exchange and many days of suffering would endure. But ultimately, I prevailed thanks to the leniency of Mr. Cosmia, who didn’t expect me to platinum them and get every ending. “Just get to the end” was the aim of the game, and that’s the bar that I set out for. But I then began to realize that FromSoftware is just going to keep pumping out harder and harder games that I’d inevitably have to play in the trade. So I did what I always do, I bargained. I’d play whatever FromSoftware game of Mr. Cosmia’s choosing, and that would be the final one eligible for the trade. After I finished it following the traditional checklist and required bosses, that would remove any souls-like game from being elligible in the future of the trade. It was down to either Elden Ring or Sekiro, and I ultimately went down the latter option. So here we go, the one for all the marbles. This round of the game trade I will be taking on Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice for the PS4.
It’s that time again where I make a certain Spartan play a game and then he makes me play a game and then we both write lengthy blog posts ranting about our respective games. This time around I sent him on a brutal shinobi quest in Sekiro, and he wanted to make sure I struggled through something as well. His solution? The widely acclaimed indie roguelike based on Greek mythology known as Hades. Climbing out of Greek-Hell That Isn’t Actually Hell but Still Looks and Acts Hellish at Times is tough work y’know?
This situation reminds me of a certain video I’ve seen. It involves two women engaged in particular activities. One woman acts frustrated and proclaims, “I’m trying to punish you, you’re not supposed to like it!” The other woman continues to quietly oblige, not looking particularly bothered.
Usually I keep mentions of my kinks to a minimum in these reviews, but this game’s not entirely unrelated. Particularly this idea of a punishment that’s enjoyed. It gets at the heart of what makes a game like this work. So unlike the other woman, I have quite a bit to say about my purported punishment. A whole review’s worth.
Spartan: Welcome to the Cosmia blog’s first ever manga discussion, I’m Spartan and joining me is the host of the blog, Mr. Cosmia.
Today we’re reviewing the first two volumes of Petshop of Horrors by Matsuri Akino.
Cosmia: That creature he’s holding doesn’t show up until Volume 2. False advertising smh
Cosmia: Is it the first ever manga discussion? Well, I guess it’s the first one that’s a group act.
S: Now that you mention it, I guess it is.
So the basic synopsis of nearly every chapter involves Count D, a mysterious peddler of pets giving people companions, telling them very specific rules on what they need to do to keep the pet (and themselves) alive, and more often than not they don’t, shenanigans ensue.
C: Count D’s pet shop is run in Chinatown. Which Chinatown? IDK probably the New York one.
S: Oh it’s definitely the New York. Most of the buildings line up with the NYC. Actually wait, I’m wrong, it’s in Los Angeles.
C: I guess that makes more sense in a way. So it’s a Japanese manga in an American setting with a Chinese main character. A rather international setup you don’t see that often from Japanese media.
S: Indeed, it is rather refreshing. Also uses the setting to its advantage with the multi ethnic nature of the US to its advantage.
C: Pretty much all of the customers have been pretty damn white as far as I can tell so far, but yeah, theoretically it could.
S: They have? *fervently checks through chapters* son of a gun they have been!
Hello folks welcome and/or welcome back to the Game Trade Reviews. Where I play a game upon a certain Spartan’s request in exchange for making them play one of my things and then we both yap about it. The Game Trade Reviews have been going on for quite some time, predating this whole ass blog’s existence. I could not tell you how many we’ve done total, but I can say this marks the 5th one I’ve done for this website. 5 is a special-ish number. So for such a special-ish number let’s talk about a series near and dear to my heart: Pokemon.
I’ve been a fan of Pokemon for a long ass time. I still remember when I got my hands on Pokemon Sapphire for the Game Boy Advance when I was like 4 or some shit. I couldn’t even read yet but I was still enthralled. I was so into it that my parents regretted giving it to me and took my whole Game Boy away. It was a losing battle.
Pokemon was very much my shit in elementary school, still a solid interest in middle school, and it’s a big part of how I bonded with my closest friends from high school. Including a certain Spartan I do these reviews with. Would the Game Trade Review exist at all without Pokemon? Perhaps not. So it’s only fitting that a Pokemon game get featured in it. But wait a second, why is this game part of the Game Trade? If I love Pokemon so much wouldn’t I want to play this game unprompted without ever needing it featured in a trade? Well… there is a reason. Stay tuned and I’ll explain all about that, and how my experience went with this whole ass game. I’ll also be covering the Teal Mask and Indigo Disk DLC. So much shit to talk about yeesh. Welp, let’s get into it.
‘hoy folks, Spartan here with another exciting continuation of the much tolerated game trade, where me and blog owner Cosmia recommend games for each other to play and write a review on them. It’s been a while since the last one, so I hope that I’m able to evade another FromSoft game….
An Atlus game eh? yeah, I can do this! they were partly responsible for the first ever game trade (the fated Kingdom Hearts X Persona 5 trade) that started all of this. I also expect to hear a lot of familiar VAs in this one from previous ventures that Mr. Cosmia might not be familiar with.
Hey guys remember 2024? I’m not so sure I want to. To be fair it wasn’t all bad. It was the year I finally got around to reading the Tokyo Ghoul manga after all. It was pretty good. Yeah… Oftentimes when people watch anime, read manga, whatever, they use it as a means of escapisms. For a moment you’re taken away from whatever ails you in the real world and get wrapped up in whatever fantastical shit’s going on in the anime world instead. I wouldn’t say that’s the only reason I like weeb stuff, but it’s certainly part of the package. Usually. Not so sure it applies to Tokyo Ghoul.
Seriously, who the hell reads Tokyo Ghoul for escapism? Maybe if you’re really into the fight scenes and incurious enough to not notice the distressing real world parallels. Or maybe you like to feel better about your own mental health by seeing others in a worse spot.
To be fair to escapists, no matter how bleak a chapter in Tokyo Ghoul gets it’s still a fictional world. Any number of things could happen and the problems stay contained to the page. So don’t worry about it and think about which characters you want to see kiss instead! I’m not even knocking that, it’s part of the fun. But I’m not going to turn away from the uncomfortable things this manga reminds me of. Come join me in this blog post as I parse through my thoughts on this mammoth of a series. Or don’t, nobody’s forcing you. Either way I’m going to go ahead with it.
Cosmia 